"With the return of our petulant cash cow to the lineup this evening, I am pleased to inform you that you are now free to win games," Cashman wrote. "I thank you for your cooperation in scuttling those irritating questions as to whether we should have re-signed Alex by creating the illusion that his contributions to the team are almost worth putting up with his various shenanigans."
Cashman declined to comment on the memo, but added, "It's plain to see that without Alex, we have potential, but we're pretty mediocre. I mean look at how we kept stranding guys on base... thank Boras we have Alex back in the lineup so we can get some clutch hitting."
Asked whether he, as general manager, bore any responsibility for the Yankees' multilayered ineptitude in the third baseman's absence, Cashman grew visibly irritated. "Look, I agree. It would be nice if someone could manage the personnel, you know, in general," Cashman grumbled. "You know, just generally manage the team, and make sure we're not overly relying on guys many years past their prime, or guys who are in their prime and just aren't very good. But who do you figure is going to do that kind of general management? I'm just the general manager, okay? What do you want from me? This interview is over."
No comments:
Post a Comment