Away games are the answer

Well, having gone last night to my first away game since 1999, I now see the solution to all my ambivalence about going to Yankee games: go to away games.

You see, for the first time in the A-Rod era, I went to a game last night and did not come back grumbling about the absurdity of the "security theatre" performed at the gates, the complete lack of freedom of movement inside the stadium, the zealous ushers and security staff who clearly would rather you didn't show up, the "fans" who clearly know nothing about baseball but will pick a fight if you fail to stand up on every single meaningless two-strike count, the incredibly disrespectful people who will stand quietly for "The Star-Spangled Banner" (with their hands over their hearts, no less, apparently confusing it with the pledge of allegiance?) then go back to whatever it was they were doing if "O Canada" comes along, or any of the countless irritations I have come to expect.

My theory on this is simple: The Yankees have created an environment in which many of us really are duped into thinking they're doing us a favor by letting us bask in their presence. They reinforce that notion constantly, with the faux-Copland theme music in their advertising, their feeble but tireless attempts to put Melky Cabrera in a class with Joe DiMaggio, and their newest monument to their rich history (in favor of which they've chosen to eradicate the largest artifact of said history). 

In short, they make it very hard for a thinking person to continue to support the team...and that's the idea. After all, if you think, you might stop spending. But there is a solution: follow the team on the road, where you can actually get close to the players during fielding practice. Where instead of feeding the beast and encouraging the front office to continue solving its problems by throwing money at them, you'll be bringing some other front office one step closer to being able to pursue that strategy...which doesn't actually work so well, thus saving us from having to worry about cohesive, hungry teams getting in the way of our motley crew of aging prima donnas. Where you'll still find plenty of fellow Yankee fans, but since they cared enough to follow the team to an away game, they'll actually know what they're talking about.

Anyway, breakfast awaits, but I'm definitely planning on going back for the second game tonight.